What time? Which Saturday?
This is a sign I saw on the side of the road a few years back. It says, PLEASE HELP – DID YOU SEE THE ACCIDENT HERE AT THIS TIME LAST SATURDAY. It then gave a number to call.
The sign was propped up against a fence for weeks and always gave me a chuckle as I cycled past.
So what time was ‘at this time’ and which Saturday was ‘last Saturday’?
Over the years I’ve collected details of a number of funny or mistranslated signs. I’m not sure if all of them are genuine, and you may have seen some of them before, but there are some very funny signs amongst them. Enjoy.
In a Tokyo Hotel: It is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to permabulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
A sign posted in Germany’s Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours — we guarantee no miscarriages.
In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, your are welcome to it.
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.
In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find they are best in the long run.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: -English well talking. -Here speeching American.
In a hotel in Weifang, China: Invisible service is available for your rest not being disturbed.
Outside a Mexico City disco: Members and Non-Members Only
In a jeweller’s window in India: We shoot earholes.
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We seem to be hearing more and more about online privacy concerns recently. I’m glad that many people are starting to take the matter seriously. In general, we’ve been far too laid back in our attitudes to what is posted online and what we make availabel for the world to see. I recently asked Are You Exposing Yourself Online? and ran a poll to see if you would take part in Quit Facebook Day.
I trust myself. I really do. I guess that’s why I’m opening so much spam email these days.
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