We’ll start with church then on to a picnic, followed by a practice for Road to Bethlehem which starts tomorrow night.
After all that we’ll be back at church for a movie night.
Amongst all that busyness, I’m hoping we’ll still find plenty of time to remember a very significant event that happened 18 years ago today. On a hot December day back in 1992, I married an amazing lady.
Pauline and I met in the January of 1992 and were married on the 12th of December the same year. Once we got engaged, half way through the year, we couldn’t stand the thought of having to wait until ‘next year’ to be husband and wife, so we picked a date in the last month of the year and started planning.
I’m still hopelessly in love with Pauline and plan to stay that way for the rest of my days. It still boggles my mind that such an incredible lady would choose to spend her life with me. She’s clever, intelligent, funny, thoughtful, wise, remarkably beautiful and so much more.
Eighteen years later and my love continues to burn brightly for my incredible bride. On that day I said ‘I do’ and today and every day I still do.
Happy 18th Anniversary to the most wonderful woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.
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It’s Marriage Week. A time to refocus and reassess this very important relationship.
It’s a time to ask ourselves whether the vows we made on our wedding day still hold today, or if we’re looking to enter a marriage, whether we have what it takes to go the distance.
Wherever we are in our relationships, it’s wise to make a concious effort to look at where we can improve and to discover steps to ensure that we are growing individually and together.
Our marriages are not private matters. Our children, gain emotional security and a myriad of benefits from our marriage, our love and union. Our marriages matter to our extended family. They matter to our employers. They matter to society. They are the fabric that holds families together. On average married people live longer and have good relationships with their children; families enjoy better physical health, married men earn more money. Wow, that puts a lot of weight on marriage!
So, do something for your marriage in this week in September, come to think of it why wait – do it now! Write a letter of thanks or praise to show your love for your spouse. Buy them a special gift, it does not have to be large or expensive. – Marriage Week
Graham and Gai Irvine were married way back in 1979. They’re the Family Pastors at Riverview Church and are on the FamilyLife Australia speaker team. They joined me in the studio at 98.5 Sonshine FM yesterday to talk about Marriage Week. You can hear our conversation by clicking the play button on the audio player at the bottom of this post.
Graham and Gai gave some great, simple, practical advice on building marriage. You can also find some excellent resources at the Marriage Week website.
What are you doing this week to strengthen your marriage?
It claims that the more time you spend with someone, the more similar you become, and that includes the way you look. I’ve heard that dogs begin to look like their owners but couples looking like each other takes it to a whole new level.
US research comparing photographs of the same couples as newlyweds and snaps taken 25 years later found many had grown to look more like each other over time because people in close contact mimic each other’s facial expressions.
I could do with a touch of Pauline’s beauty and I wouldn’t mind a thicker head of hair but I’m not convinced she would be keen on looking more like me. The longer couples stay together the more alike they become and considering that we’re intedning on sticking together ’til death do us part’ there may be very little hope.
Dr Ruth Walker from the Flinders Centre for Ageing Studies at Flinders University said similarities between couples could also have health impacts.
“If one person’s mood is quite negative, even depressive it will affect the other person, as it will if they’re happy,” she said.
Have you seen older couples becoming more and more similar in mannerisms, moods, interests, behaviours and looks?
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Apparently many people are using Facebook and other social networking sites to look up old flames or to find new ones. Many don’t see the harm in flirting with online contacts.
Divorce lawyers claim the explosion in the popularity of websites such as Facebook and Bebo is tempting to people to cheat on their partners.
Suspicious spouses have also used the websites to find evidence of flirting and even affairs which have led to divorce.
One law firm, which specialises in divorce, claimed almost one in five petitions they processed cited Facebook.
So is Facebook to blame?
As we all come to terms with new technology we need to be constantly examining the boundaries that are required to keep our relationships safe, but I can’t help wondering if we also need to re-visit and reinforce some old boundaries.
My marriage vows included a promise to ‘forsake all others’ and that goes for every part of life. I started this post asking if our online lives could be destroying our real world lives but that’s really a deceptive question. It’s a question which presupposes that those ‘two lives’ are somehow separate. They’re not. The real world real you is really the person punching the keys on the keyboard and it’s really you who is flirting with another real person via a real keyboard and computer somewhere else in the world. It may be on the other side of the planet or next door, but real people are involved.
I talk about my family a fair bit on both Facebook and my blog. I’m not leaving anything open for interpretation. I love my wife and whether I’m at home, at work, out with friends or online, people should be in no doubt that I will continue to forsake all others.
I don’t buy the argument that flirting is just light hearted fun. Whether it’s online or offline, if you’re married, flirting should be reserved for your spouse.
So is Facebook fueling divorce? I don’t think so. I think it simply provides another opportunity for people to act out the things that are already in their hearts.
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17 years ago today, on a hot December day in 1992, I married an amazing lady.
Pauline and I met in the January of 1992 and were married in the December. Once we got engaged, half way through the year, we couldn’t stand the thought of having to wait until ‘next year’ to be husband and wife, so we picked a date in the last month of the year and started planning.
I’m still hopelessly in love with Pauline and plan to stay that way for the rest of my days.
How we met
I told the story of how we met quite some time ago on this blog and figure that on a wonderful day such as this, it’s worth repeating.
Around December 1991 and January 1992 I was spending a bit of time with a young lady . She was invited to a big picnic event at the Claremont Showgrounds by a friend. My friend asked if she could bring someone else. The someone else was me.
On the day of the event, I picked up my friend and we headed over to pick up one of Pauline’s sisters, who was the person who’d invited us. We got to Pauline’s parents’ home and were invited in.
I met Pauline in her mum’s kitchen. She was, and still is, incredibly beautiful. I was gone right from that moment.
Pauline and her mum were looking at photos from a family wedding they had recently been to in Queensland. I thought that the photos must have been from Pauline’s wedding and I thought, “I’m too late”. After quickly checking Pauline’s ring finger I realised that wasn’t the case. I thought at the time that it was probably inappropriate to be thinking that way. As I mentioned before, the lady I was there with was only a friend but it did seem like bad form to be so absolutely distracted.
Together with my friend and Pauline’s sister, I got in the car and we headed off.
Meanwhile, Pauline and her mum, who were heading to the same event, got in another car and started towards the showgrounds. Apparently Pauline said something in the car to her mother to the effect that it was a shame that all of the good ones were taken. Pauline obviously hadn’t checked my ring finger and thought that I was a married man. Her mum told her that my friend and I weren’t married and in fact, as far as she knew, we weren’t even an item.
We managed to catch up at lunchtime at the showgrounds and chatted for a little while. I was smitten to say the least.
It actually took another couple of months for us to get together but once we did we started talking about marriage very quickly. By the middle of the year I was convinced that I was not just in love but that I was prepared to commit my life to Pauline, to love her no matter what for the rest of our days. I asked, she said yes, we got hitched.
As a bit of a joke I came up with the motto, “Say ‘I Do’ in ’92” in late 1991. As it turned out it wasn’t so much a joke as a wonderful reality.
Seventeen years later and my love continues to burn brightly for my incredible bride.
Happy 17th Anniversary to the most wonderful woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.
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