Relationships

Characteristics of a good marriage

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Once a fortnight during my morning radio programme on 98.5 Sonshine FM I chat to Rob Furlong about relationships of various kinds. We discuss how to develop better relationships. The only person we can truly control in our relationships is our self so we also discuss ways to move forward personally so that we can bring everything we should to a relationship.

A couple of weeks ago we started discussing the building blocks of marriage. That segment was just the beginning in a journey that we’ll take over the coming months as we seek to look at the most important characteristics of a good, solid marriage.

Today we looked briefly at a couple of the characteristics which we’ll unpack more fully in the months ahead.

We started off looking at the concept that men and women complete each other, not compete with each other. Rob believes this is the basis of the character trait of Courage as we face life together.

The sceond trait we touched on today was that of Love, noting that marriage is a permanent relationship.

If you’d like to hear what Rob has to say just click the play button on the audio player at the bottom of this post.

What do you think are the essentials of a good marriage? Are there things you know now that you wish you’d known before you married? If you’re single, how are you discovering what you need to know to equip you for marriage?

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What love language do you speak?

Mar 8th, 2009

by Rodney Olsen.

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Have you ever tried having a conversation with someone who speaks a different language to you? You may get some of the main points across but you really don’t feel as if you’re able to freely communicate.

Author Gary Chapman believes that we face a similar situation when we try to express and receive love. In his ver popular book, The Five Love Languages, he suggests that there are five love languages. Chapman argues that while each of these languages is ‘spoken’ to some degree by all people, we will usually speak one primary language. He says that all are important and should be ranked to help us understand more about ourselves and those we love.

So what are the five love languages? Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. Where do you think you fit?

The essential thought behind Gary Chapman’s work is that we can be doing our best to communicate love yet it feels that we’re just not getting through. It could be because we’re speaking the wrong love language.

Life Skills Trainer, Jill Bonanno, joined me on Friday morning on 98.5 Sonshine FM for our weekly radio segment, Simply Living. As part of our monthly Book Club we reviewed Chapman’s book and spoke to listeners who have read the book.

You can hear our conversation by clicking the play button on the audio player at the bottom of this post.

I’d be very interested in your point of view. Leave your thoughts in the comments section of this post.

Have you heard of the five love languages before? Have you worked out which is your primary love language? Do you know the primary love languages of those you love?

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The Building Blocks of a Good Marriage

Feb 24th, 2009

by Rodney Olsen.

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According to Australian Family First senator Steve Fielding, divorce adds to the impact of global warming as couples switch to wasteful single lifestyles.

His claims were highlighted today in the News.com.au story, Divorce adds to climate change says Family First senator Steve Fielding.

We understand that there is a social problem (with divorce), but now we’re seeing there is also environmental impact as well on the footprint.

He’s certainly got a point. If divorce means that families that once occupied one household are now split between two homes, they will be using up more resources than if they stayed together.

While I think there is merit in looking after the planet, I think there are far greater reasons to keep marriages together. I understand that it may not always be possible and that many readers already know the pain of divorce. Although I’ve never experienced it I know that it must be a devastating experience and that there aren’t too many people who would take such a step lightly.

So if we’re to keep marriages together, even turning difficult marriages around, we need to go back to basics and understand the building blocks of marriage and our part in keeping a relationship not only alive but thriving and growing.

This morning we started discussing the building blocks of marriage. Today’s segment was just the beginning in a journey that we’ll take over the coming months as we seek to look at the most important characteristics of a good, solid marriage.

If you’d like to hear what Rob has to say just click the play button on the audio player at the bottom of this post.

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Dr Pat Love in Perth

Jan 31st, 2008

by Rodney Olsen.

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For more than twenty five years, Doctor Pat Love has contributed to relationship education and personal development through her books, articles, training programs, speaking and media appearances.

Her ever-popular books such as Hot Monogamyand The Truth About Love have literally taken her around the world spreading the good news about marriage and committed relationships. Pat is in demand as an expert presenter. She has appeared many times on Oprah, The Today Show and CNN.

Pat Love joined me in the studio at 98.5 Sonshine FM today for a chat about her work.

We all have a yearning for intimate relationships yet we usually fail to give relationships the care they need. Is it a fear of vulnerability or do we just lack the tools to make relationships work? You can hear what Pat has to say by listening to our conversation. Just click the play button on the audio player at the bottom of this post.

Pat Love’s latest book is titled Why Women Talk and Men Walk: How to Improve Your Relationship Without Discussing It which is also sold as How To Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It. It’s a book which has been very warmly received by men. It was very interesting hearing Pat’s understanding of the different roles that we play in relationships.

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