Sale time

I’ve cycled right across Australia 5 times battling headwinds, hills, heat, rain and even bitter cold. I’ve travelled to India twice and battled their chaotic traffic on my bike. I’ve taken on all kinds of challenges but this weekend I took on the ultimate test of physical and mental stamina.

On Saturday afternoon, during their annual sale, we took the family to Ikea.

We drove across Perth to be faced with our first challenge; getting into the car park. It was pretty tough crossing Scarborough Beach Road but we eventually made it. We even managed to find a parking bay fairly quickly. That was in sharp contrast to the dozens of lost souls who have been circling the car park for weeks looking for a small patch of bitumen where they can let their car rest. Maybe that’s what hell’s like; an eternity of searching the Ikea car park for a parking bay.

After this first achievement, it was all on as we made our way into the store. It was absolutely packed full of people. I’m quite sure Ikea’s main objective is to have you totally disoriented. By the time you’ve turned a couple of corners in there, there’s no way of knowing what direction you’re facing, and I don’t think they give the furniture strange names by accident either. It’s all part of the plan. Or maybe the staff get a kick out of people asking for a “Gullhoman and three Ekkores, two Falangs and a Frukost please”.

We eventually completed our shopping and made it out alive. Then we had to wait for about 20 minutes for our orders to be processed at the pick up area. To be fair, there was a huge queue and they were pumping out the orders at a very rapid rate.

Of course that’s never the end of the challenge. We had to employ some creative packing techniques to get our ‘Billy’ into the boot. Then when we got it home, we were ready for the real fun; putting it all together.

To tell the truth, the assembly wasn’t too much trouble. Pauline and James set themselves the task and before we knew it we had a new shelving unit for our lounge room.

Some people climb mountains, some sail the seas to explore new lands, some undertake superhuman feats. Why? Is it simply, as some say, because it’s there? No. It’s to avoid Ikea at sale time.

Posted by Rodney Olsen

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